Satisfaction lies in the effort, not in the attainment. Full effort is full victory. -Ghandi
In life, there are many victories. Every day, hour, minute, every second is a victory. Victory doesn't have to come in the form of a championship or a medal or a ring, though more often than not that is how we choose to define it. Victory is consciously deciding that 'you can, you are capable, and you will.' Victory is existence, choosing to persist.
The world in which we live is so very complex. This complexity arises from the existence of numerous systems working in relation to and opposition of one another. Thus, everything is connected in some way or some form, whether good or bad. As humans, we operate on quite a modest scale in comparison to the rest of the universe, however every single one of our actions holds the weight of what feels like everything. Weight has the power to transform actions and thoughts. It's a force that creates obstacles, limitations. As humans, we often feel this weight in the form of fear or surrender to it accepting defeat. But why? If given the choice, and we are always given the choice, choose to carry on. In spite of difficulty, endure.
Sometimes it takes a heartbreak, tragedy, or a fear for this idea of victory to come back to remembrance. Don't let it. Remember that each morning you wake up to a new day, you have victory over the last. Sometimes personal victories may seem trivial. But each and every battle won, no matter its make-up, size or relevance, makes you stronger.
Yesterday's Victories
20 mile run.
Miles 0-2.5: Climbing up, up and up. Nothing like starting out with a bang. A comfortable and easy pace left me feeling energized and optimistic. Victory number 1.
Miles 2.5-6: Straight and flat. I can do flat. I grew up on flat. Swigged some water. Digging it. Victory number 2.
Miles 6-14: Alright, some undulating hills... and rocks. My New Balance minimalist shoes are great for running- not so much for long distance running though. I purchased them back in mid-February and already the Vibram sole has worn away under the balls of my feet. Youch! My feet hurt. Babying my steps is causing some slight irritation in my right groin/hip flexor area. I ignore it. Pain is temporary. Mental battle is won. Victory number 3. Spotted an owl sitting on a branch of a Eucalyptus. Victory number 4.
Miles 14-17.5: Straight and flat again. Now I am not so fond of this. Seeing the road ahead of me makes it feel endless. No light at the end of the tunnel. Feeling parched, very parched. Found a fountain to refill my water bottle. YES! Victory number 5.
Miles 17.5-20. I really don't want to fight this hill now. I told myself during the previous mile that once I reached this hill, I'd feel happy because then I'd reached the home stretch. At this point, I was more so just fearful. I feared the hill. Please don't own me. Winding around sharp turns.. they all looked the same. I turned towards Ray and said "This is the last turn and we've made it to the top!" Rounded the corner to find that, in fact, it was not the top. "Torture. This is torture." Another three quarters of a mile and there it was. THANK YOU!!!! Victory number 6. Continue downhill and just as I reach my final destination, decide to turn right. Gatorade, now! Stop at the local convenience store, hobble in because practically every part of me hurts, purchase a large bottle of melon gatorade and chug continuously until gone. 20 miles completed. Thirst quenched, almost. Victory number 7.
Thank you Ray for running with me! Big Basin 26.2, we WILL own you.